We'll start at the beginning of the pregnancy. Of course I got morning sickness around week 6 or so. By week 8 my arthritis started to really flare up as well. One day I was fine and thinking that I didn't feel so bad being on 10 mg of prednisone/day, the next I wake up with morning stiffness that lasted for hours. Gradually as the weeks went on, my joints got worse. What started as a couple hours of being stiff turned into most of the day.

My grandfather had RA and I remember when he used to talk about the weather affecting how his day would be. That could not have been closer to the truth. Last fall in Pennsylvania, we had a hurricane that came through in August. We ended up with massive floods and more rainy days than dry throughout the fall. This also helped to make my flares worse. Gradually as the weeks went on and I started to gain weight with the pregnancy, my joints got worse.

At the time I was working 3 days, 12 hrs each shift. It got to the point where I could barely make it to work some days and thankfully FMLA helped me keep my job. After 2 months of suffering I made an appointment with a new rheumatologist. She told me that my RA was progressing and put me on disability from work so I could rest. At this point, we were still hoping the RA would go into remission and ease the pain for the rest of the pregnancy.

By my 4th month of pregnancy, I could no longer wear jeans or shoes. My knees, feet and ankles were so swollen nothing would fit but sweat pants and slippers. There were some days where I would be stuck on the couch or the toilet and could not get myself up. I actually needed to call my husband for help to move. Nothing will put you in a depressed mood faster than having to tell your almost 3 year old daughter to go get Daddy because Momma is stuck on the toilet.

Before I was diagnosed with RA, I was a VERY independent person. Not usually asking for help and doing things myself. To suddenly be so dependent on someone else for help caused me to start to become a very sad and angry person. I started to be short tempered with my husband and sometimes my daughter. I didn't know how to cope with the fact that I couldn't clean the house, get the laundry done or potty train like a normal wife and mother. It was a struggle to get up off of the couch to try and make lunch. At this time I also started to pull away from my husband. I didn't want him seeing me as being weak or unable to do things I normally could. I knew it was wrong to do this to him, but it happened and I became more miserable because of it. All this started a downward slide....

Like my mom always says, "If Momma ain't happy, nobody is happy"..... that couldn't be closer to the truth for the next 5 months.....